Cultivating the 'Ahh' in Menopause
- 12 minutes ago
- 6 min read
Whether you or someone you know is going through 'The Pause,' or maybe the beginning stages of perimenopause, you may be familiar with the typical laments of hot flashes, night sweats, weight gain, irritability, mood extremes, mind and memory fogginess, mysterious body aches, frozen shoulders or the feeling of bugs crawling on you (yes, that happens). This tends to the be experience most women have with perimenopause and menopause, and with the prospect of these symptoms lasting anywhere from 3 to 20 years, it can be a difficult pill to swallow when approaching this change.
Yet, what if instead of dreading this and/or even outright hating your body (the ‘ughh’ response), you looked at this time of your life as a beautiful deepening of your relationship with your body, sensing your life’s wisdom and leaning into greater qualities of softness (the ‘ahhh’ response)? Much of change in life relates to our attitude about it. Many women feel completely distraught and lost through this time, fighting physical, mental, emotional or energetic symptoms. Though, in other cultures, this transition time is revered, celebrated, and women are honored and uplifted, they’re given time to rest when needed, they gain more social freedom, and are frequently elevated. How would you like your story of menopause to go? With an 'ugh' or an 'ahh?'
Shifting your relationship with this change starts with welcoming it, rather than fighting it. For some women, health reasons or personal choice will inform if they decide to manage ‘The Pause’ medically with hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Thankfully, over the last 30 or so years, huge scientific advances have been made that make HRT more approachable, less risky, and an overall more pleasant experience. Other ways to welcome the change of perimenopause and menopause relate to diet considerations, alcohol consumption, exercise and movement, and practices that cultivate loving kindness and acceptance. Where you hold the power of your menopause story falls in how resistant you will be, or whether you step into embracing how your body, energy, mood and attitude are showing up.
For the body, and for most women, gaining weight, having night sweats and hot flashes, and dealing with new mysterious aches can be troublesome. Personally, I’ll share that I’ve tried no less than 4 different deodorants, always managing to sweat through them as if I hadn’t bothered to use anything (that’s different!). And the stubborn belly bulge that likes to sometimes distend so far that I look pregnant – well, I’ve opted to change what I wear, going for comfort (while still stylish) over aesthetic, which has been liberating! This may be the best thing I’ve done for myself through my own journey. Diet is another way to help ‘manage’ the symptoms, and you may even find your tastes in foods change through your menopause journey. In cultures where women generally eat a more plant-based diet, they overall report less incidents of hot flashes and night sweats. The other big impact you can make is to significantly reduce or eliminate alcohol (at least for a little while). Throughout perimenopause and menopause, your hormones are changing and the load the thyroid and liver bear to process alcohol makes them less efficient at processing your changing hormones in a supportive way.
Energetically, healthy sleep hygiene (getting enough quality sleep) and breath regulation are two ways you can feel more present throughout the day. Some women have more trouble sleeping through perimenopause and menopause, and using a body relaxation technique such as progressive muscle relaxation, or listening to a yoga Nidra or other recorded meditation at bedtime may help your body find its natural rest and digest state. Using diaphragmatic breathing techniques, which initiate the breath at the belly (rather than in the chest or shoulders), also helps to tone the vagal nerve and keep the body in an overall calmer state throughout the day so you’re not burning through your energy too quickly. I’ll also offer the practice of mudras, holding your hands in specific patterns to align energy systems in the body and support your overall well-being. The image above is Trimurti Mudra, used in yoga to promote feelings of loving acceptance, embracing change and looking forward to the opportunities that await. For those of us going through perimenopause or menopause, we may sense there's ZERO opportunity here. Perhaps we might reframe.
And this is where working with beliefs and patterns of thinking that detract, rather than enhance an experience, come to play. ‘Energy flows where attention goes,’ coined by Tony Robbins, invites that where we focus our thoughts gains more power. This is especially helpful when wanting to try something new, set an intention, or believe in the possibility of an outcome. If, on the other hand, there’s a belief that things will never get better, that going through menopause will always be a struggle, then guess which mindset you’re feeding? That’s right – it’s stinkin’ thinkin’! Through mantra, meditation, affirmations and outright choice, how you experience your menopause journey has a lot to do with how you think about it. For a moment, think about what it might be like to embrace the idea of perimenopause and menopause as an awakening. How might you come to cherish the body that has carried you through life with many wonderful experiences, even if it looks a little different today? When those bouts of irritability flare up, how might you welcome them to reveal something you’re not seeing? When your energy is low, how might loving compassion for yourself invite you to take rest, rather than ‘soldier’ through?
Movement is also important through perimenopause and menopause. However, instead of those 20-somethings cardio workouts and ‘feeling the burn,’ it becomes more helpful for women going through this change to practice more passive and/or strengthening movements such as yoga, Pilates, Tai Chi or Qi Gong, and slowing down to walk mindfully versus running. As you go through menopause, bone density decreases as estrogen decreases, making you susceptible to osteoporosis. Through mild to moderate resistance training (think wall Pilates or yoga push-ups), you can direct supportive stress to the connective tissues and muscles surrounding your skeleton, reinforcing your mobility as the body undergoes change. Continuing to stay active is a key marker for healthy aging, and helping the body learn new ways to move safely, maintain balance, build resilience and work on heart rate variability will serve you well beyond your years of transition and into those golden years. Of course, please check with your medical provider before starting any new exercise or movement programs, and they may make other suggestions to you as well. Slowing down is a primary theme through menopause, so I encourage you to explore activities that keep you limber and mobile without the taxing stress of high-endurance training. Yoga is a wonderful practice for this, and my absolute go-to!! I have a new love for chair yoga (it can be much harder than you’d think), restorative practices, gentle flow, and any type of movement that connects with my breath. In these types of movements, I feel the grace of my body, and I suddenly feel like ME again!
The decision to move towards ‘ahh’ and away from ‘ugh’ starts with you. Each day is a new opportunity to experience life, and no two days will be the same. As you navigate your journey, look to the practices and habits that support you, healthily nourish you, uplift you, give you rest (aka: a ‘pause’), and celebrate you for the amazing woman you are! For now, I’ll leave you with Trimurti Mudra, and coming soon, I’m excited to offer a series to support women moving through perimenopause and menopause with grace and loving acceptance, learning to lean into opportunities and welcome this time in our lives, feeling balanced and centered.
Trimurti Mudra – for menopause and life transition:
· Start by joining thumb-to-thumb and index finger-to-index finger to create a triangle.
· Keep the other 3 fingers resting alongside one another and place your hands over your abdomen.
· Take a deep breath in and as you exhale, let your arms relax and belly soften.
· Continue to take several deep breaths, bringing to mind qualities of peace, ease, acceptance, unconditional love and hope, and let these move into your womb-space.
· With each inhale, bring in the energy of fire and air (purpose and dreams) to fuel your embracing outlook.
· And with each exhale, feel the energies of space, earth and water (trust, grounding and fluidity) settle into your body.
· You might repeat this mantra from Joseph LePage's Mudras for Self Healing and Transformation: Balanced at the center of my being, I embrace life's transitions as opportunities.
Whether your journey is just beginning, or you’ve been walking this path for some time, remember that this is yours, and yours alone (though you're not alone), to travel. Everyone experiences life differently, as will they experience perimenopause and menopause differently. I wish you the journey that feels most supportive and authentic to you! And if you’d like to learn more about my upcoming series, Embracing Change, A loving way to walk through menopause, send me an email. I’ll be sharing the details of the program in the next couple weeks, and it feels so needed to offer this!! With many wishes for ease, where you may find it ~ Jen Rizza
Jen is the Founder of Newtown Wellness Collective, a Reiki Master Teacher, Holistic Wellness Coach and Therapeutic Yoga Teacher. Learn more about Jen and the services she offers here. Contact Jen at jrizza@hdrestorativewellness.com
References:
Dr. Marie Claire Haver, ‘The New Menopause: Navigating Your Path Through Hormonal Change with Purpose, Power, and Facts,’ Rodale Books, 2024
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